Video games!

Hey, hello! It's me again, the crazy hilarious idiosyncratic you all love. Not that there's an all, ha-ha. In fact, I've been having so little page views I'm getting a little discouraged. Ha-ha. But I'm not! So, bucklers, let me have an interesting topic for today:
VIDEO GAMES!
Who doesn't like video games? Wait wait wait, what? You don't like video games? Get out of here! I mean, really, get outta here. This is all about vid-ee-oo-gaa-mes!
But to be honest, I don't really play video games that much. I played with lego and read books and did boring stuff ( to you at least) when I was a kid and I've only started playing um, a little too late... About four years ago... And not regularly.
Needless to say, I'm a noob. (a noob, for those noober than me, is a very weak player)
FPS, RTS, MMO, RPG. Flash or 3D. Whatever kind of video game you play, you feel alive in that game. Wait! Hold that thought. Could that be the reason why video game addicts waste at least half their day sitting in front of a screen? Why a Minecraft noob would play four to eight hours a day honing their skills to be able to craft diamond armor in ten minutes? Why an FPS twitcher still twitches after being devastated by a lightning strike killstreak of a no-life addict with a twenty four killstreak?
Could that be so?
That these players, are insulted and bullied so often, kicked out of their social circles, that they abandoned their social lives and chose to lead a new life in a virtually realistic world, where they are heroes, and where they could communicate and even build relationships with their own kind?
What has happened to humanity?
Or do these players just seek pleasure and entertainment in the form of video games?
That would probably be the reason of at least half the gaming population.
But the no-life hardcore addicts have shunned reality and embraced the virtual world.
WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT!
WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THIS BLOG? I thought this was going to be a diary or something, not some sort of weird article.
I mean, come on guys! What kind of weirdo would write that?
You just did, you crazy hilarious weirdo, you.
Alright, I'm sorry bucklers. I got a wee bit carried away.
You know, I'm almost sure you guys are probably thinking, "I sure wasted my time reading this stupid article. I'll just go read something better, like twilight or something."
Well guess what. I just did!
Nah I'm just kidding.
See you soon bucklers! I'm going to do another video game blog tomorrow!

Hurtophobia

Hey, hello! It's me again. I think I'm making this blog like an online diary of some sort, due to little spare time in researching what to post. And today's post is about..!
My fear of heights!
Ever since I was a child, I had a recurring nightmare about me falling down three flights of stairs in a mall. I would wake up breathing heavily and sweating profusely and so afraid that I would go to my mom's room and sleep there. That fear was made solid when I jumped down to a hammock and I hit my back hard on the floor(which probably caused my hunchback-ness). I was so scared at that time because for a moment, I failed to breathe, and I felt unbearable pain. And that's the history of my fear.
But I don't really think that's my fear.
I think I'm afraid to fall, because I don't want to get hurt. You can call it cowardice... introversion... but I'd call it hurtophobia.
(Maybe that's why I'm still single! x) )
Okay I am feeling slightly awkward.
Maybe I should finish this post.
Maybe.
Nope. Still going to write.
You know, I once read that writing consistently improves one's writing 'muscles'.
How come I'm still skinny? Bam!
Oh, Lance, you hilarious idiosyncratic, you.
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But really, though my friends may say otherwise about this 'hurtophobia'(though they may agree on me being afraid of rollercoasters and heights) due to me being impulsive... you know... when there's something really serious happening like.. um. like this:
(a classmate jokes that my teacher looks ugly)
Teacher: Do you really think that I'm ugly*? (machine guns us with insults and degrading stuff and showing signs of rage)
Me: (the only one laughing) Yes miss you look REAL ugly*!
*though [ugly] was not the insult made
Okay, that was a rather light example. I've got tonnes of examples, don't you worry.
Too many samples, too little time.
However, dang it. Just be convinced I am not a coward.
What! You still think I'm a coward and none of this things make sense?
Well, fine! Forget about everything you just read. I am not a coward! I have no fear! Wait, is that a~
FLYING MANTICORE! RUN!

Hey it's my first blog!

So... I have nothing to write yet... so I'm posting an excerpt from the novel I'm trying to write.
After reading, please do comment suggestions or violent reactions. x)) Kiddin'!
Voila!

Candidate for Flashback number one
Open for Editing

IT was summer when they stumbled across an old room in the west wing that Paracelsus forgot about. They were cleaning the old Raschind Palace as part of Leo’s ‘training’, and Leo excitedly led the grumbling Paracelsus to the old room.

  The mahogany door was decaying, and the doorknob was rusty, all the more inviting the curious nine-year-old to open it.

“Come on, open already!” little Leo grumbled when he found out that the door was jammed. Paracelsus saw this opportunity to gauge how much the kid learned about alchemy.

“Then use alchemy, idiot!”, and hit him on the head with his cane.

“Ow!” the apprentice protested. Then he drew the alchemical symbol for iron and wood on the doorknob with the tria prima. Then he started the alchemical process with the wooden transmutator. The door sparked with bright silver light and was restored back to its original luster.

“Ha! How’s that for something you taught me three days ago?” Leo teased, elated.

“Not bad, not bad… But don’t get too cocky, hairball. Watch out for what’s inside…” Paracelsus said mischievously.

“I heard that there was a boy that got lost in that room and was never found. Some say he got sucked into the darkness… but who am I to know? I’m three centuries old! You, on the other hand, are only nine. A boy. You can go there and prove that the story is wrong… Or can you?” He added with a dark expression. When he saw that his plan was working he added,

“Scared yet, kitty?”

“N-no! I-I’m not scared.” Leo muttered, shifting uncomfortably.

“Really? Then open the door.”

“S-sure! But I’m not scared!”

Then the tiny Leo, barely able to reach the knob, cautiously opened the door. A smell of mothballs entered his nose and he sniffled. When he opened it fully, there was only darkness.

“Told you I’m not scared.” Leo said triumphantly.

“Not yet. Light up the room to prove it.”

“Whaaa!?”

“Put some light in the room, dummy!”

“I’m not a dummy!”

Then Leo barreled straight in the dark room until his tiny footsteps weren’t heard. After a few seconds of silence, Paracelsus got worried.

“Hey kid, you still there?”

He walked cautiously in the room.

“Hey Leo, this isn’t funny anymore…” He walked further in the dark. Then he heard a scream.

“LEO!”

He started running in the dark, completely ignoring the cobwebs and the dust that seemed to attack him from all sides. “Leo!” He called again. He ran faster until he could see nothing and then,

“BOO!” someone yelled.

“Yaah!” Paracelsus shrieked, startled, and tripped on something and hit his head against a solid wall. Then the wall fell down and a booming thud echoed in the dark room. Hard objects rained on Paracelsus, and he shrieked again.

Then everything lit up. Paracelsus blinked, surprised by the sudden light, and heard the cute laughter of a nine-year-old. It was Leo, laughing uncontrollably and rolling on the floor. Paracelsus was relieved and then got angry with Leo.

“You moron! What if something wrong happened, dummy? I think I even lost some of my hair when I hit that...” He stopped, squinting and taking in his surroundings. “When I hit that shelf..?”

Dust and cobwebs covered the rows and rows of bookshelves in the grey marble floor. Sunlight streamed from the broken windows in the dome overhead. A lone chandelier burned brightly from the center of the dome. The ‘wall’ he hit his head on was a bookshelf, and the books buried him and scattered on the floor when he rose. He dusted his black vest and slacks. He looked around the ancient library, and was awestruck by the multitude of books.

Leo was still laughing uncontrollably.
“You should... have… seen your… face!” he said between breaths.

“Why you ungrateful ball of poop! I’ll make you see en to pan in this!” Paracelsus said, fuming.

“All right, all right. Chill out, cheesebrain. “ He stopped laughing.

“Oh. What’s this?” He picked a book from the ground and wiped the cover with his palm.

“T… The… The G… The Gr… Gr…” Leo tried to read, his face contorted in frustration. “The Gr… Gr… Dang! I can’t read it. Can you read it for me, candy cane?”

“Nice approach.” Paracelsus frowned. He took the book.

“It says, ‘The Great Archidoxes’. What, can’t you read? You’re like, nine already.” He scoffed.

Leo looked at the ground with a sullen expression. Paracelsus remembered he kid’s dark past and felt guilty.

“Alright kid. I’m gonna teach you how to read. But you’re grounded for a week for tricking me!”

Leo brightened up.

“Yessir!”

Seeing how the kid tricked him, and how fast he learned alchemy, Paracelsus said, “How hard can it be?” and shrugged.

--------------------------------------------------------0-------------------------------------------------------AFTER nearly three months of debates on why oxen is the plural form of ox and not oxes, and how have had be grammatically correct, Leo finally got ready to read the book. Then he locked himself up for a day in his room and read ‘The Great Archidoxes’.

In the morning, Leo prepared breakfast, which greatly surprised Paracelsus.

“Well, well. This is new. So, how was the book?” Then after a glance at Leo, he added “Interesting outfit by the way.”, for Leo was wearing one of Paracelsus’ vests and wore an oversized trouser instead of his small overalls.

Leo grinned from ear to ear and skipped around the table. “The book was awesome! It was about the Archidoxes and their battles and… Oh man, they’re really cool! The coolest Archidox was the third one- man; he could use animation alchemy without a stone! Awe-soome!” Leo said, out of breath, and looking very excited. Then he saw Paracelsus’ puzzled expression, crossed his arms, and turned backwards.

“But you wouldn’t know ‘cause you haven’t read it. Dummy.”

“I do know. And I don’t need that book to know…” Paracelsus whispered.

“You what? “ Leo asked, his eyes widening and gleaming with curiosity.

“No! Nothing.” Paracelsus quickly answered. “S-so why did you make breakfast?” He asked, trying to change the subject.

“Ah well, there’s something I got from that book..”

“Interesting. What is it?” Paracelsus asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I’d like to be an Archidox. The greatest Archidox ever. Then people would make a book about me and a kid would read it and get inspired to be even greater than me. I’d like to save people’s lives and be a hero. Then everyone would feel safe and won’t get scared anymore, because I’d get all the fear and danger for them.”

Paracelsus was surprised at first, and then saw the kid’s wide eyes burning with determination.

He laughed and smiled. Then he clasped Leo’s hair and rubbed his head.

“Then you’ll have to eat more breakfast, because you’re gonna train harder to achieve that, poopball.”

Leo’s expression instantly changed to a surprised one, then he smiled.

“Bring it on, cheesebrain.”

Paracelsus remembered the kid’s father and smiled. He looked through the broken windows and saw the sky.

“He’s just like you.” He muttered under his breath.

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All right! How was it? do tell. :)